What does it mean to be the girl next door? Who is she really? Is she the girl your bring home to meet your parents and start a family with? Or is she the woman you cheat on your wife with?
Sometimes I like to think that I could be that girl next door. Not saying that I want to either a) get married right now or b) break up a marriage ever. Still, with my artificially blonde hair, fake nails, and practically flawless smile, my appearance is apparently innocent. That is until my side profile projects my double nose piercing, and I roll up my sleeve to show an array of dark ink permanently stained into my skin. Put me in ripped jeans paired with a white t-shirt and now I’ve got that bad girl appearance.
The common theme I recognize amongst these kind of girls, of women, people like myslelf is that heartbreak circulates around us. Why is this though? Why are the effortlessly awesome people, such as us, so often being shattered and brought down by emotions?
Well, to put it simply is that we are just too good for relationships. I use the word “we” because I know that there are many females like me out there. Those headstrong, independent women who have tons of opportunity in the dating world, yet consistently remain single through the years. Let me tell you ladies that we are not the problem here, but in that same sense we are 100% the problem.
How is this so? Because we are seemingly perfect, and perfect girls need a perfect guy (or girl or however you want to see it, I get it we’re in the twenty-first century now, there is no exclusion).
Yes there are tons of great guys out there, but perfect won’t settle for great no matter how hard we try to. Which brings me to our dilemma as being the girls next door: we have made ourselves too good. Through a lifetime of overanalyzing and critiquing ourselves, we introverts have now transformed into the perfect combination of humbly attractive.
Guys like how we never speak too loudly or too softly, rather our voices are like cream in their black coffee. They like that we don’t need to go out to have a good time, but when they takes us for a night in the town we will show up looking like America’s Next Top Model. They like that we can play pretty and nice, yet when it comes to fun we know how to get down and dirty. I’m not talking sex I mean we like to go outside and ride on atv’s and play in the water and get too drunk and puke in front of them sometimes.
We are your girls next door and we are better yet known as the heartbreakers. You see, the problem with me personally does not reside in my looks nor my personality. I am a nice girl, a freaking awesome one at that. The issue is I just don’t know what I want.
So I’m trying to figure that out, which unfortunately means a lot of trial and error ending in heartbreak on my side, their side, and sometimes both sides.
Why do I keep trying though? I’m in my twenties and I haven’t even hit a year mark with the same person. Meanwhile all my friends are in serious relationships and are beginning to get married and have children. So are my family members and my exes. Sometimes I feel like I’m the only single person in the world, until someone walks up and starts hitting on me. Then I remember again why I am still single in this small town full of nobody quite interesting enough.
Yet here I am running around posing as some girl next door. She’s smiley, flirty, short, shy, and cute, but is she happy? Of course not, BUT she’s making it all work for the better every day. That’s close enough to being “happy” isn’t it?
Well we may not always be happy, but we will always have our goals. So why should we girls next door let these people take away from our direction? We need to follow our goals and say, “Screw relationships! I am going to be successful on my own first! I will work towards a marriage only after that!”
Yet…I still feel the want of someone’s touch and not just that of a stranger. I want memories together in our youth, and if I have to wait until I’m successful…well how long might that take?
This is how I end up heartbreaking others. I falsely devote myself to them for a period of time, never quite leading them down the direction of a serious relationship, and then I move states.
Alright I have only done that once before, but with how things are looking in my love life and also in my professional life I would not be surprised if it happens again.
So what do I want? Do I want a relationship or a successful career? And who’s to say that I cannot have both?
Finally I realize who has been saying that though, it has been me preaching myself to my own choir all this time. I am the one who seems to believe that the two cannot come together hand in hand.
What do you guys think? Can you become successful while also remaining devoted to a relationship? Or is it just not plausible?